Thursday, January 17, 2008

2008 OSI Network Fairness Model

In the interest of maintaining fair internetworking for all, here is a new layered networking model for the next generation tubes implementation, which ensures that those who actually own all the content you have been stealing are fairly compensated, and those with a bad attitude about that are smartened up.

The OSI Network Fairness Model [2008]
Data unit Layer Function
Host
layers
Data 7. Application Network process to application
6. Presentation Data representation and encryption
5. Session Interhost communication
Segment 4. Transport End-to-end connections and reliability (TCP)
Enforcement
sub-layers
Meaning, Gist, Intellectual Content 3a. Clone Redirect Clone and redirect to any requesting enforcement agency or paying commercial service (police, intelligence services, credit reporting agency, telemarketing companies etc.)
3b. Delay, Drop, Mangle Delay, Drop or Mangle packets of competing services, especially but not limited to untariffed VOIP, online advertising and vindaloo take away
3c. Automated Copyright Management Detect any electronic use and directly debit semi-random users savings account
3d. Automated Litigation Commencement File suit with over reaching damage claims based on faulty evidence in wrong jurisdictions against minors, the dead, pets and people who don't know how to use computers.
3e. Attitude Adjustment Trigger one or more of the above filters if user's attitude is not favourable
Media
layers
Packet/Datagram 3. Network Path determination and logical addressing (IP)
Frame 2. Data link Physical addressing (MAC & LLC)
Bit 1. Physical Media, signal and binary transmission

Thanks to Wikipedia for OSI Model

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